Can a successful entrepreneur simultaneously sustain a successful relationship? Well?!
Don’t expect me to answer! I’m new at this!The bright side: Another part of this road of transition has involved my romantic life. This is the part of entrepreneurship that most of the incubators and SBD resources I have come across don’t talk about. In the last few months, I have seen the advantages and challenges that come with working for yourself, as it pertains to being in a relationship. Not having to report to anyone means that I can “work from home” with my beau by my side; I can take pop-up vacations like the one we just had in Vermont, and get work done from my laptop; and leaving work “early” to catch dinner or lunch is never really a problem.
More recently, however, I have started to weigh the challenges a bit more and I have been getting nervous. My boyfriend and I have been together about six months but (cheese alert,) it definitely feels like I’ve known him for years. Our relationship kind of came out of nowhere, amidst the period of me thinking about whether to take this plunge, but it has truly been everything I could have hoped for (and in many ways, it has helped me on this road). He is loving, handsome, thoughtful, sensitive, brilliant, hard-working, spiritual, patient and, greatest of all, supportive- especially of my recent changes.
The concern/question: I promised myself that balance would be an integral part of this chapter: I wouldn’t spend sleepless nights in front of my computer, nor would I sleep in till noon every day because I could. For the most part, this has worked, but when it comes to a relationship, it requires much more self-discipline.
He travels every week for his job so we currently only get to see each other on weekends. This means that when Friday hits, all we both want to do is spend every second together. This can often be challenging because, as the saying goes, an entrepreneur’s week never ends. Admittedly, there have been moments when I have fallen behind on work during our romantic weekends. We recently promised that we’d each make sure to carve out time to be productive when we’re together but it gets challenging. The tough part about running your own business is that there is literally always something work-related that could be getting done; e-mails, business plans, networking events, marketing strategy, social events, planning, designing, calling… the list goes on and on. In order to be a successful entrepreneur, you gotta be ALL in- no doubt about it. I definitely think I fit the mold in that respect; I go to bed thinking about my company, I dream about it and I wake up and have it for breakfast. I don’t think this is a bad thing but how can a (new) relationship grow when all I am focused on growing right now is an enterprise?
I am challenged by the fact that with all of my projects going on, I barely have enough time to schedule family visits, fitness, spirituality and leisure. And this is only the beginning; I am certain this balancing act will only become trickier. I have also been doing a lot more traveling and I expect to be traveling even more often soon with my newest project. Things will only get busier, which means time will be harder to divide… how does a relationship survive under these conditions? I definitely want to remain with him and yes, the “could he be the one?” question has come up once or twice (or a hundred) but… I guess I just worry. I don’t want to be neglectful because of work; I don’t want to stifle our growth or take our time together for granted. But I also am so excited about my new road… how do I balance it all?
The contradiction: I truly believe that things happen as they should. As you read in my last post, I recognize that something greater is guiding my path, and letting go to it is tantamount to success. (This is the hardest part.)
I also know that when I create and become committed to any possibility, it will happen. I guess I just wonder… worry about how this all works when it seems like two commitments require the same amount of attention and they are both so important to me…
I can’t think of anything I want more than to grow in this relationship and develop a long-term loving and committed relationship, hopefully toward a path that leads to marriage and a family. But… I also can’t think of anything I want more than to see my company grow, and to be hugely successful helping people, by doing what I love.
Is this contradictory?
Can I have it all?
I’d like to think so but… What if I have to choose one day? What should win? What will win?
Perhaps I am getting worked up for no reason.
What do you think?
Things like this are the questions I hadn’t anticipated having to think about so soon.